Hodgepodge (The Fourth Serving)

Sometime Mid-March
Mood: Swinging from normal to frazzled
Songs for the Moment: Let Go (Frou Frou)…go watch The Holiday.

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I’ve never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that being strong meant never losing your self control
But I’m just strong enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride
Let if fall like rain from my eyes

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I can’t believe that this is only my third blog for this year when I have resolved that blogging will be something I will do AT LEAST once a week. I might have lost my concept of time for good. A week for me has stretched to two months… like I am in a warpzone where time has succumbed to obscurity. Come back to the real world, Bernard. Time is fleeting and it goes on without you. You should have learned that valuable lesson last year.

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Things I Learned So Far This Year

1. It is better to see things the way that they are. And not the way you wish they could be.
2. Silent victory means winning the argument by shutting up.
3. That "I have no time” is not an excuse. You have to “make time” for the things that matter (like watching Heroes and Entourage on DVD)
4. Common sense is not common anymore. Or some people are just freaking afraid and unsure.


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Life on Shuffle

To spice up my life with some spontaneity, I’ve conjured a new scheme. I will put my iPod on shuffle and the first three songs that come out of it will serve as a horoscope / theme / guide for the coming week.

Here’s what came out:
- Kissing A Fool (George Michael)
- Hello Sunshine (Super Furry Animals)
- Flood (Jars of Clay)

Ok I get it. I will have sunshine and some flood. Very much like LIFE or something like it. Whatever…just bring on the kisses, fool!

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Infinite Sigh

Sometimes I remember and the pain grips so hard it feels like nothing matters but the overwhelming misery. So this is how it feels. It goes without saying that I deserve it. I chose this road so whatever agony I feel is self-inflicted. Maybe I am masochistic.

Though I vowed to forget the pains of the past and just keep the beauty in all the madness, I still reel from the what-could-have-beens.

They say that it is only in misery that we find out who we are…and who we can be. Why must I always find it out the hard way?


***

March started on a stressful note and has been more of a losing battle to keep my cool. I blew my top as early as the first Monday of March.

It really pisses me to high heavens when people do not step-up or live-up when expected. It’s as simple as ringing the alarm bell beforehand so that I (in my own little way) can do something.

I am the type who works down to the details. Maybe it’s a blessing and a curse. But I really can’t take last-minute shockers. I often pysch myself up for something and those last-minute shockers destroy my sense of solidity.

But then again this is force majeure (as my law teacher would call it). I am just a hapless victim of circumstance. I have no choice but go with the flow…swimming against the tide is simply grueling and remarkably pointless.

They say that you can’t change the way the wind goes. Maybe it’s time to re-adjust my sails.

***


Just heard a news article over Breakfast that call center agents are subjected to a lot of work-stress because of the unusual work hours. And up goes my eyebrows!

While I have nothing against call center agents, I find it appalling that work-stress is credited to them. Last time I checked, stress is probable (maybe a “given” even) for all types of profession. There are devils in Prada lurking in all kinds of work environment and that alone can make Stresstab manufacturers ecstatic.

As with anything in life, it is a matter of the pros outweighing the cons. Stress comes when the “power” shifts to the cons.

At least those call center agents have fat wallets to go with their so-called work-stress. Some people are not that fortunate.


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I can’t wait for June…if only because the long-delayed Wild Hope will finally be released. Wild Hope is Mandy Moore’s first foray into being a singer-songwriter. The album is already generating major buzz, with often anti-pop Billboard Magazine dedicating a cover story on Mandy and her new-found musical footing and creative relevance.

If the first singe Extraordinary will be any indication, then this album is bound to be well…extraordinary.