Goodbye, My Toshiba (Meet My New Baby)

This past two days, I’ve been walking on air and hugging a precious white thing on my arms like a long-lost lover. The precious white thing happens to be a new Toshiba Satellite A100 laptop. At this very moment I am stroking its soft keys as I watch my thoughts appear on the pristine wide screen. Once in a while, I glance at its smooth white casing (a Mac it's not but I'd settle for this). Any tech whore will get a natural high in having this new plaything.

After more than a year of sitting in my corner, silently weeping and slaving on my fully-depreciated laptop, I finally earned enough good feng shui points for our company to bless me with this new baby. Good things really come to those who wait. When this baby arrived, I went immediately to our VP Finance and asked her to check if I got the right unit. The set was really beautiful and I was containing my excitement just in case there was a mistake. I can’t deal with disappointment on a tech-y level.

After checking the invoice amount, this baby was declared officially mine. I spent the most part of my day transferring files and installing programs to give this baby the signature Bernard mark. Then I readied my old trusty Toshiba laptop for its next heir apparent. I removed all the files that has maxed out the hard drive and exhausted most of its memory.

So to my old Toshiba laptop, thank you and I wish you well. It pains me to see you go coz we have shared so much history in this past 3 years or so. You were with me during the nerve-racking presentations and very seldom did you fail me. On the few times that you did, I understand that it is only out of sheer exhaustion coz we worked overtime days before that. You were with me in the late of night and in the wee hours of the morning, analyzing data and compiling reports while cheesy pop music blares from your speakers. We both work while sharing a bag of Lay’s Salt & Vinegar and we would laugh at the crumbs left in the corners of my mouth and in between your keyboards. And who can forget the time when my boss spilled Pokka green tea on you while we were in a major meeting. You remembered my lessons on being tough and didn’t succumb to the liquid invasion. In no time you were working like nothing happened.

I now bequeath you to your next owner who I am sure will take care of you. Do not be jealous of my new baby coz you will always be the first. And I will just be a workstation away, we will still see each other often. You will still be under my watchful eyes and God knows what I will do if I ever see you being maligned. I will keep the number of Bantay Laptop (a.k.a. Mikokak) handy, just in case.

Be nice to your next owner as you were with me. I know you’ve had your tantrums in the past but I managed to appease them. Do not conk out when she is at wit’s end preparing her business review. Do not hang just when she is so engrossed in work that she forgot to save her current working file (but then you have always had this amazing recovery capacity). Keep your power cord tidy so she will not accidentally trip on it and unplug it, turning your power off. Be patient with her as she has more supply of Pokka green tea than our boss. I am not sure if you can take another liquid attack.

And to my new Toshiba, fret not. You cannot find a better owner than me. Here’s to all the presentations and datawork that we will be doing. Cheers!

Whoa! I can’t believe I just wrote an ode to my old laptop and a toast to the new one. I really need to get a life.

Parental Guidance

Mood: Pensive, Nostalgic...Fatherly

Mood Music: Elsewhere (Bethany Joy Lenz), Promise of You (Edwin McCain), How (Lisa Loeb), Brighter Than Sunshine (Aqualung)


Browsing through the newspaper this morning, I realized that today was my least favorite day of the year. Yes, Father's Day is something absurd and alien to me. Short of drowning in bitterness of the past years and cursing the universe, I instead decided to be mature (read: fatherly) and accept the things that just can't be.

Still, reading articles paying tribute to great dads brought back a deluge of memories. Not just of a past that is best left forgotten (in a box of memory labelled as "LIFE LESSONS"), but of my own experience as a quasi-father.

I became a father at age 13; but not because my raging hormones got the best of me. My mom decided to have another child after ten years. The initial reaction was, of course, excitement. After putting up with each other's whimsies, my sister and I will finally have a new playmate. But soon after the screaming bundle of joy came, we realized that our life will never be the same again. Being ate and kuya entails responsibilities and sacrifices. To put it bluntly, it robbed us of what was left of our childhood days and thrust us head-on in a very adult world. At age 10 and 13.

I remember waking up at the middle of the night to frantic wailing and fighting off sleep while preparing the milk formula to appease the screaming little villain (we didn't have a yaya then). Then the paranoaia if the milk will not do wonders and the wailing continues (oh no, something might be wrong with him!). I remember spending the entire afternoon washing dirty lampins (yes, laced with poopoo). When he was able to trash his little body, I remember my attempts to confine him in his little space with tons of pillows but at the same time preventing suffocation. Then there are the futile attempts to keep everything out of his grubby hands and his unstoppable mouth that wants to eat anything colorful (mental flashes of me eating mothballs at age 2).

Of course, there were the cute funny moments. His attempts to imitate or narrate anything he sees on television. The quips that will easily make it to Kids Say The Darnest Thing. His improvised toys (until now we call a folder slider "handa" coz he used it as a sword). The bulol words that soon found its way into our household vocabulary (ei-dor for electic fan, mineWAL water, south UMA-market, toi-LATE). The wide-eyed (and I mean WIDE-eyed) awe at seeing or experiencing new things. The things he fears and how we will sometimes feed the fear so that he will cry and make sumbong (maybe this was our childish way of getting back at him).

The funniest experience I can remember is his huge fear of ABS-CBN's sarimanok (their station logo at that time). Channel 2 has a promo where you will write down the shows where the sarimanok will appear. We didn't know how that fear started but he will really be hysterical and will run outside (or to the arms of anyone of us) whenever he hears the sound or sees the sarimanok. The funny thing is that after a while, he WOULD know when (2 seconds before) the sarimanok will actually appear so that he was already running away from the TV. Call it kid's instinct or weird talent but he will always be correct! If the contest was "Guess When The Sarimanok Will Appear", we would have been millionaires. Looking back, our theory was that he saw something real scary on TV and the sarimanok appeared so he associated the sarimanok as a precedent to something scary.

Three years later, another bundle of joy arrived (the last one, at last!). Imagine having a new baby and a 3-year old brat. Double the work… twice the cost. Three times the fun (two individual antics plus their "combined" antic). This page will not be enough if I were to narrate all the things I can remember.

The scariest and cutest thing that we will always remember was when the two of them was separated from us in the supermarket, when they were 2 and 5 years old. We found them already outside the supermarket. 5-Year Old was acting like a little kuya while consoling the already crying 2-Year Old ("Wag ka na umiyak, makikita din nila tayo").

From little brats there are now big brats. The 5-Year Old consoling the 2-Year Old is now 1st-Year-High-School fighting with 3rd-Year-High-School every five seconds. The babies you confined so lovingly in a safe place are now out of the house for the most part of the day (to God knows where).

And here I am, older and maybe wiser. My fatherly instinct for my siblings has stuck. Part of me wants them to have a better life (I do not want them to experience what I experienced growing up). But I don't want them to have an easy life either coz it will just destroy them eventually. I want them to also experience hardships (as I have) so they learn the value of things. I want them to make mistakes also and get life lessons from these mistakes. I want them to be equipped with everything material and immaterial for the real-world battles that await them. But how do you do that when you see them only on weekends and by then you are too tired to even care?

So to all decent and responsible fathers out there, Happy Father's Day! I think if all of us will be good parents then this world will be a much better place. Being good parents might just be our best contribution to this world and our only shot at immortality.

Reality Blues

Wednesday, May 31 My House in QC
Mood: Bliss...bordering on stupid bliss (I had quite a long sleep...six hours is already "long" for me)
Music: None...TV (as expected) is showing "Breakfast" on Studio 23


Yeah, I know. Where have I been? It's been more than two weeks since I last updated my blog. I've been running to hell and back. Check out the burn marks.

I remember one officemate asking me if I ever get tired. I said I do, but I haven't reached my breaking point..again. I've reached it before but thankfully I've managed to back down and focus on other things. Another friend advised me to stop and smell the flowers. I said the flowers will always be there as long as you are on the right road (the one with proverbial greener and greener pastures on both sides). That shut up her up.

I am hopeless. I have no concept of time other than it is flying.

I have two-weeks worth of muddled thoughts. Here goes some of them...

Making It Real. I am a sucker for reality shows. Survivor. The Amazing Race. The Apprentice. American Idol. And yes, even Pinoy Big Brother. And mind you, these are the groundbreaking ones and the more "sane", more creative (if not wittier) reality shows. I will never watch the mundane and overzealous ones like Project Runway, the Bachelor, High School Reunion, etc. But I've succumbed before to The Newlyweds. There is guilty pleasure in watching Jessica Simpson make a fool of herself. I just can't believe how her brainless antics can translate to her huge CD sales in the US. I guess ignorance begets ignorance.

With US TV season almost over, most of my favorite reality shows have had their season finales. And how unlucky was I this season! All of my favorites had to settle for runner-up honors, even if they are the most deserving. Grrrr... fate really has a weird way of twisting things.

Amazing Race. The Amazing Race was kinda toned down this season. Less bitching, less breakdowns, less screw-ups. I can't believe the teams are even helping each other out (especially the ones with non-elimination penalty). Yeah, I'll say this season was kinda boring but they did ran a good race. My favorites were Eric and Jeremy (the so-called "frat girls"). I swear they are the anti-thesis of frat boys. They are somewhat nice, have tolerable ego and definitely not power trippers. Only three things justify their frat boy status, they excel in physical challenges, they don't do well on mental challenges (which will be their downfall later) and they sometimes let their testosterones get the most of them (too bad the all-girl teams have to exit early).

I want them to win coz they are nice/honest and they finished first in more pitstops than any other team. And they were able to accomplish this without resorting to back-stabbing, deception or outside help (which is very common in Amazing Race). I couldn't say the same thing with eventual winner BJ and Tyler (the Hippies). They finished last two times and were only lucky because both times were non-elimination legs. They made other teams fight with each other. And they are just lucky that the final challenge was metal (they were geeks after all). They are just downright lucky! Damn! I would go further and say that they are the most un-deserving winners of Amazing Race.


Survivor. This season of Survivor was more exciting because new mechanics came into play (Exile Island and immunity idol) and the challenges were modified and more complex. My early favorites were Nick and Teri, but with Nick (considered a threat) eliminated early, I only had to root for Teri. Teri is, hands down, the most deserving to win the title (as bad boy Shane would admit later). He was the last man standing from his original tribe (and thus had to survive being an "outsider" in the merger tribe), he found the immunity idol at first try and won 5 straight immunity challenges.

Teri's downfall was also the final immunuity challenge which has to do with balance. It didn't help that he won the reward challenge before that so he was well-fed and maybe heavy with food. Of course, Danielle, the last girl standing, won the immunity and had to pick the who will join her in the final two. She voted out Teri in favor of tribemate Aras!

Danielle was more of a wallflower and it was really a lose-lose situation for her. But I think it was a stupid move to vote out Teri. Yes, the jury might think (like me) that Teri is very deserving but Danielle should have seen that there is that off-chance that her tribemates might stick with her enough to make her a winner.

It wasn't a surprise that Aras won. Although I have never liked Aras, I think if not Teri, then it would have to be Aras.

The only negative thing that I can say about Teri is that he was was so damn possessive of the immunity idol. On the final night when the immunity idol can be used, Teri was safe from being eliminated. He could have given the immunity idol to Danielle so she need not go for a tie breaker with Cerie for the third spot. Until now I couldn't understand what Teri's gameplan was in not "sharing" the immunity idol. If he had done that, then for sure Danielle will pick him in the final two which will then seal his fate as the winner. I think as with real life, one decision can greatly change the outcome of things.

American Idol. This a reality show that is bordering on no-brainer but being a music-lover, I can't help but be hooked. Katherine and Cris were my early favorites, Katherine for her looks and talent and Cris just because he really rocks. But soon after, I realized that the other contestants were really more vocally talented than Katherine, I was just thrown off by her looks. Cris was ok but his voice is really suited for rock songs and is thus limiting. Yet I was shocked when Cris was first voted out of the final four. By then, I was wondering what Katherine was doing there in the final three. I was expecting a Cris-Elliot showdown in the finale.

Elliot didn't register on my AI radar until the final 12. Elliot slowly made his way to the top, getting better and better with each performance. In some of his pieces, Elliot even sounded better than the originals. I really like his version of "I Don't Wanna Be" and "On Broadway."

Elliot (who I fondly call Mr Tulmus...remember Chronicles of Narnia?) made Paula cry in one of his sentimental pieces. In another performance, Simon remarked that he maybe the best male vocal they've had EVER (eat your heart out Clay Aiken!). I think he never got scathy remarks from Simon. It was also a joy watching Elliot and his Mom and the way Elliot cried when he was shown his homecoming footage. I always root for the nice guy, in my belief that nice guys don't finish last (if you look at the total picture).

I knew Elliot didn't have Taylor's charisma and Katherine's looks but I was hoping that America will recognize talent (as they have done before with Kelly, Fantasia and Rueben...only Carrie had the combination of looks and talent). So I was depressed when Elliot was voted out in the final three...in an almost 3-way tie which has to be scrutinized to the decimal point.

I swore to boycott the finale but then there was nothing to watch in my non-cable TV in my house in Manila. So I had no choice but watch the finale which proved to be quite spectacular.

In the Taylor-Katherine showdown, I had to go for Taylor. He brings a new musical genre to the often-too-pop American Idol. He really nailed it in his final song prompting Simon to declare that, based on that performance, he is the American Idol. Taylor asked in his final piece - do I make you proud? Yes you do, Taylor.

Even after being booted out, Elliot proved in the finale that he is a force to reckon with. He shone in his performances (with the other contestants and especially in his duet with Mary J. Blije). You could hear the audience cheering everytime it was Elliot's turn to sing. I really hope Elliot will get a recording contract. I'm sure Cris will get one, what with the resurgence of rock/alternative music.

Incidentally, Mandy was also rooting for Elliot and later Taylor. She even watched Taylor practice his finale pieces and was there to cheer her own in the actual finale.

Pinoy Big Brother. With my losing streak with regards to my reality bets, I dare not tell the world who I want to win for PBB; lest I jeopardize HER (there goes your clue) chances of winning. In hushed voice now...peng you yi shen yi qi zou, ne xie re shi bu zhai you.

Sigh! With reality TV season over, there is nothing to look forward to anymore. Ok, I'm exaggerating... there is still CSI, CSI New York and Grey's Anatomy on cable. And thanks (sic) God I was able to get Season 3 of One Tree Hill from my suki DVD pirate. Too bad The O.C. Season 3 is still incomplete. I heard that a major character will die in the Season 3 finale.

So until the next season of reality shows, I would have to contend with my own reality. Another heavy sigh!

XOXO


Blogger's Note: I composed this blog last week but was able to post it just now. As of posting time, PBB has declared it's winner. And finally, my reality show curse was broken. SHE won. Chinese cutie all the way! Xie xie!

Also, Chris Daughtry and Taylor Hicks have made a dent on the Billboard Hot 100 charts with their first singles off the AI album. Chris' song ranked higher but I think Taylor's second song ("Do I Make You Proud") will go straight to #1 once it is officially released next week. In another news, Chris has turned down the offer to be the vocalist of multi-platinum rock band Fuel. He said he will pursue a career as solo artist. Good move I think. Now all I have to wait for is Elliot's move.